Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Week 10: Perceptions

The funny thing about perceptions is that everyone has one or many and most of the time we are not even aware of our own thoughts about a person or situation. To clarify we are not aware of WHY we have those thoughts. There are so many things that go into the composition of a person's perspective that it's difficult to point to one culprit. Our opinion is a result of accumulated experiences with social identities. It is great and it sucks at the same time.

I suppose the easiest culprit to point to is gender identity and how that influences me as well as you. The way I look at a situation compared to my male counterparts can be very different just because we experience life differently. The best example is our perception of romantic situations. Have you seen the movie "He's Just Not That Into You"? Well... that is one of the examples. One of my best girlfriends, Adrienne, is in love with her friend, Victor. According to her they really connect and there's a change he's returning her feelings even though he is dating other girls currently that ISN'T her. My husband and I view this differently. There's a part of me that believes he does have feelings for her but doesn't want to be with her because he doesn't want to ruin the relationship. (He has said this.) My husband thinks he isn't interested and he's just being nice. If a guy wants to be someone, he will make the effort. Is my perception of the situation different because as a woman I want to romanticize it and root for my friend? I certainly don't want to further break my friend's heart and tell her "he's just not that into you". I mean there's nothing wrong with her and nothing wrong with him either. As women we want to believe that there is more to a guy than the surface and perhaps they are a charming prince underneath it all... what if he isn't.

I think women get these ideas from years and years of socialization via Disney movies and playing house with dolls. It is ingrained in us from the beginning to look for that "Prince Charming". If he doesn't exist, let's make him up! I mean there is nothing wrong with shooting for the stars and being with a good person, but come on. The media as well as society puts a lot of pressure on women to get married and have children by a certain age that it further taints our view of love and relationships. The key is to be more aware of what we really want and who really are versus what we're being influenced to do.

Do you think the media and society have helped to shape your gender identity also?

1 comment:

  1. I do think that the media has influenced how a boy or girl should act. Its not like you ever see a little girl laying with a Tonka Truck in one of their commercials. But why? Why can't a little girl play with a truck? Because she is supposed to be playing with Barbie, that's why. So I completely agree with you.

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