I would say the most embarrassing moment happened when I wasn’t there live in person. This is a true story. I was only in high school at the time and I had begun dating my now husband, Jason. His family is very conservative and religious. They resemble the Cleavers very much. Though I had met them a few times, I did not know them very well and we were all still getting acquainted. I had just gotten into a large fight with my mother and sister when Jason called me to see if I was coming over to have dinner with his family. I was very annoyed when he called and I told him to leave me alone because I had to clean the “god d*** living room because my mother and sister were being f****** b******”. Little did I know that I was on speaker phone because his family wanted to greet me also. It was and still is terribly embarrassing. My husband and I have never talked about that incident because we both know just how conservative his family is and just how humiliated I was. I’m glad I wasn’t there in person to experience the humiliation and I’m glad that no one has ever brought it up.
When I look back on it, I still feel the shame and embarrassment. His family was merely trying to welcome me into their family and I appeared very vulgar and classless. It is a big deal meeting a potential mate’s family especially when you want to make a good impression and build a family with them someday.
In relation to the public speaking class, I think I have the same issues with public speaking and communication in general. Sometimes I am not aware of my audience and I say inappropriate things or the manner I say things are inappropriate. For example, when I speak to my professors sometimes I use the filler word “like” or I use slang to describe something. It makes me look unprofessional and can indicate my lack of commitment to school. I refer to my embarrassing moment to help remind me to think before I speak because the repercussions can be very detrimental to relationships I’m trying to build or maintain.
Wow, I'm so sorry this happend. But thank you for sharing it, I'm sure that was really hard to move forward from. It's so great that you've taken so much from the situation though. I think it's such a good reminder to realize the how effective our words can be, both negatively and positivly. It's really tough to try to not say something wrong but we all do it and then we have to move forward and learn from it. Thanks for your thoughts!
ReplyDeleteYea, one of my biggest fears is saying the wrong thing at the wrong time. It is better though when you said that you weren't actually mad at them, but you were just taking out your anger.
ReplyDeleteWow, talk about unintentional communication! It's nice to see, though, that 1) you've moved past it and use it as a reminder to think before you speak (if only everyone would do so!), and 2) "errors" in communication can be forgiven - Jason and his family didn't hold it against you! :) One of my colleagues had a similar situation, she was working on her PhD dissertation (on Latino culture) and accidentally referred to one of the people she was interviewing as Mexican...when he is actually Puerto Rican. Eek. Luckily, they were able to move past the faux pas...and are now happily married! So, obviously, miscommunication happens...how do we deal with it when we put our foots in our mouths?
ReplyDelete